Look At The Babies On This Video!

Look for the little white spots!

We Are Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise!

Thanks Virgie for the title, hopefully that is okay that I used that. I just believe that is a great way to put it.

Today was interesting. Our appointment was later than usual so we were at least awake for it. We gave ourselves plenty of time to get there, so we ended up almost a half hour early. I was shocked when they took me back to the room early, but that ended when I ended up back in the "holding room" to sit on a bed until they were ready for me. This time, there were 2 women ahead of me so I knew it would be awhile (and I left my book in the waiting room with Barry). After over an hour, it was my turn. I went into the procedure room and noticed the torture chair again. I showed Barry what I was talking about and he laughed.

Finally we were under way. It took a while to get everything done, but not too bad. I kept getting worried that something was wrong because they kept stopping and waiting. Freaked me out. So, in the end, we transferred 2 embryos. The first was a 4 cell type A and the other was a 3 cell type B. This was after only 2 days. They did say that this is how they always do it, so we have to believe they know what they are doing. It helped that Barry saw a couple come in with their baby to show the doctor. At least we know it does work.

So, they explained that my blood test is on June 9th. And they gave me a new shot to do, but only every couple days. It was not too bad.

I did ask if I had to be on strict bed rest today and they said no, just don't do anything strenuous, but I have given in and told Barry that I will stay in bed at least "most" of today. Then I will go to the couch and just veg from there. I am completely a mess though right now. Everything I do I think is going to make the babies fall out. From peeing to walking up the stairs to our place. And then to have to wait so long to find out for sure....we are going to go nuts!

Oh, Barry made me wear blue today so we could send good boy vibes. When I told the biologist, she said that statistics show that most IVF babies are girls. Guess we will see, lol.

Sorry little ones, you did not make it. So sorry that we did not get the chance to meet you. I pray that some of your siblings will stick around for us to know.

How Many????

Well, first of all, I am feeling much better today. Still a little sore, but all in all, a lot better than last night. I was fine as long as I sat upright, so it was easy to stay up late. When I finally went to bed, it was painful, and I realized that we would hear the fertilization report in the morning. I got really nervous, but I must have been really tired because it did not last too long.

SO......................................

We just got the call from the clinic. Out of 13 mature eggs, 13 fertilized!!!!! They said that they did ICSI (sperm injection) with all of them. They have picked the 2 that they believe have the best chance of implanting and will put those back tomorrow (Thursday the 29th). They said that they believe that we will have 9 to freeze. They said that they would give us a picture tomorrow and that Barry can not only be in the room, but video the procedure too. Yippee!!!
She said to be there at 1145am and there are no special instructions. I can eat and drink all I want.

Our Babies Are Being Conceived Today!!!!

Well, all went well today. Really sore and no good pain meds like some other people, but doing okay.
I was still very nervous about the messed up trigger shot. And then I had to go to bed at 10pm so that I could make it from then to 9am without eating or drinking anything. Anyone who knows me knows how crazy it is for me to go to bed that early. It drove me crazy. So, I was sore, hungry, thirsty, and not tired at all when I went to bed last night. Not to mention freaked out about the retrieval. I ended up getting a couple hours of sleep and that was all.
We got to the clinic at 815 (I was supposed to be there at 830 for my 9am "surgery"). They told me to use the restroom and then someone would take me back. I did and then went to the waiting room with Barry. Finally, after a while of no one showing up, I walked to the desk to ask what I should do. Apparently, they were still waiting for me. So, she took me to a small room and gave me sandals to wear and a place to put my clothes. So, I changed and went into the next room. There were 4 beds and another lady had just finished her procedure, so I was in number 2. The anesthesiologist came and went over the form I had to sign and put in the IV needle. And then I waited. Finally they came and got me. I had to get into a normal GYN chair (at least normal here, not just a table) and then they told me to put my legs up on this contraption. Think sitting in a chair and then putting your legs on things above your head. Then they strapped me in. The anesthesiologist told me that he was starting the meds and that it would be burn as it went up my arm. As it got to the top, everything faded.
I woke up a little while later feeling a little groggy and a little sore. Once I grabbed my glasses, I realized that it was only 10am. This meant that I still had at least another hour to wait and nothing to do. Hubbies can not come in there for the privacy of the other patients, so I was really bored. To explain how bored I was, I spent the majority of the time watching the bottle of saline drop into my IV. Toward the end, I realized that by turning my hand a certain way, I could slow, stop, or speed up my IV. LOL
Finally a lady came in to tell us all about our egg reports. They were all in German so I could not understand their results. She told me that I had 13 eggs, 12 mature and the other might mature. They said they will call tomorrow with the fertilization results and we will set up a time for the transfer. Then she told me about the different meds I needed to start today.
Turns out that the only pain meds that they gave me were when I was asleep after the surgery. I am in some pain now, especially when I try to get out of a chair. I have tried to just veg on the couch this evening and relax. Some things are much more difficult to do right now. Hopefully this will ease soon. I don't know how people with tons of eggs do this if I am this sore after 13.
So, I will update in the morning once we know about the fertilization report. Hopefully we have something to use. Of course I am so worried that we won't. Oh, by the way, the trigger shot worked just fine, LOL.

Worried....

I just did my trigger shot. When I went to fill the syringe, I noticed there was a bubble at the top of it. When I tried to move the syringe forward, it was sticky, and some of the meds shot out. I am now freaking out that I am for sure not going to get enough meds. One side had a full dose and the other side was almost .2 less than that. What if I messed up the whole process because of the last shot? I just don't know what to do. To go through this whole thing and then to mess up on the last one? Barry says that I should not freak out about it, but it is hard not to when they kept saying how important this one shot is. I hope I did not screw up.

We Have Eggs!!!!

Well, today was our last stimulation check. We knew from the last appointment on Monday that we had some growing, and we knew from the pains that they must be getting bigger. So, we went in for the u/s (it really hurt this time) and were pleasantly surprised that we had 12 EGGS!!!! Yep, we have 6 on each side and they are measuring between 13 and 18 mm. From what I could tell, the doctor was pleasantly surprised as well. I really have started to think that this clinic is more about quality than quantity which I think is a pretty good thing. I just want to have some still available just in case this does not work.
So, after the u/s, we went back into the office and discussed the protocol for the rest of the process. Since I am completely out of Puregon, they are having me take the Menopur that we have not used yet. I will take 4 vials today and 3 tomorrow along with the Decapeptyl that I already take in the morning. Should be interesting because I hear that Menopur really burns and I would imagine so since they said to only use one vial of liquid for 4 vials of meds. So, I will do this today and tomorrow, and then Sunday night I will do the trigger shot (at 11pm) to help with the releasing of my eggs (1 shot in my left side and 1 shot in my right side). Then I will go in Tuesday morning for the retrieval. They told me that I should bring a big t-shirt and socks. I guess knowing the German clinics, if I forget, I will be laying there naked, lol.
The funny thing is that what worries me the most (after whether any embryos will make it) is the fact that I can not drink anything after 10pm Monday night. I will go crazy. Guess somebody is going to bed early that night. Grrrrrrrrrrr.......

Ouch.....

Well, the eggs are definitely growing. Last night was the first time I could really feel them. Up until this point, I was worried that I might not get any. I have been so worried that I am not getting enough meds each time, especially when I run out during an injection. But now, in addition to my bruised tummy, I have really sore ovaries. It hurts to do a lot of things; sitting, sleeping on your side, going to the bathroom, walking up stairs, deep breathing, etc.
Ouch......

Starting To Feel Like A Pin Cushion.....

I am starting to feel like a pin cushion. I have 16 holes in my tummy. They just recently starting bruising too. So, now giving a shot in the general area is quite painful. The one side is worse than the other. One hurts to get the shot and one hurts more after the shot. This morning's shot was the first time I actually hesitated when I went to put the needle into my skin. It kind of hurt. Wow, who would have thought that I would be doing this. Anyone who knows me knows I am quite the wuss. I am just thankful that so far I have not had to do THREE shots a day and only do two.

A Good Report.....I Think.....

Well, we had our stimulation check today. It was my first since starting the actual stim med Puregon. The appointment was at 7:45am so we had to leave really early and the traffic was still horrible. But we made it with time to spare. Thinking we would be some of the first there since they only opened at 7:30am, we were surprised to see a full waiting room. After sitting there for a little while in the waiting room, they actually came and got me to do my b/w before my appointment (normally I do it after). The poor nurse who normally draws my blood and gets it on the first try could not find a vein. She was embarrassed after all the praise I had given her in the past. I think it was just because she forgot to use the butterfly needle. Another lady had to come in and do it, but even she had trouble today. After that, we went back out into the waiting room until we were called into the office. He told me to stop the mini dose of aspirin after Thursday and no "sexy time" after Thursday as well (I never can quite understand the doctor and I just write what I thought he said, lol). Then he did an u/s and it was interesting that we could see some eggs growing. Not as many as I would like but it is just the beginning. He would not even tell me how many and said that he would be able to tell me more on Friday. So, we left after being told to call at 4pm.
Just called the clinic, and they told me to keep doing 350IU of Puregon with my other shot. I am so freaked that I am going to run out and that it will mess up the whole cycle. Very frustrating. I did ask the lady if things at least looked good. She said yes, that there were 6 egg cells growing. But to me, that sounds really low of a number. Is it just cause it is early? Or am I really just making a few eggs? I know you only need one, but I am now worried that we will not have any that are good.

Scared That I Messed Up...

My doctor told me that, although the vial says that there is only 600IU in it, it actually has 700IU. So, I was trusting him. The first vial worked that way, 2 exact 350IU doses. Then today when I was doing my Puregon shot (2nd one from the vial), I got to the little line right before the zero. I did not know what to do. Do you put in a new vial just for one click of the pen or do you just not do anything? Barry talked me into not doing anything. But now I am completely freaked out that I messed up completely. What if this "mistake" messes everything up and I don't get any eggs because of this? I am totally freaking out and nothing is making me feel better so far. It is too late to do anything about this shot today. I will have to ask at my appointment tomorrow.

Puregon.....

The Puregon was fairly easy to do. I am a little concerned that I did it so early. It may make some things a little more difficult, but we will have to figure it out. They told me to do it in the "evening." So, I felt that 6pm was a good time, but then I found out that I could have done it any time between 6 and 11pm. I would have done it later so that it would have been more convenient for us. Oh well, now I have to stick with the 6pm. Might have to take it in a cooler if we go somewhere.
As for the shot itself, it went okay. The needle seems a little bigger than the Decapeptyl needles, but still did not hurt. You have to use a little more effort to push in the button than I do with the syringes, but I got it. The only thing that bothered me was that my stomach is pretty sore in the area where I gave the shot. It will be interesting to see if it is like that every time.
One down.....

The clinic....

I have meant to take pictures and post about this clinic for awhile now, but I kept forgetting the camera. I finally remembered today so we got some pictures. The yellow building is where the clinic is. You have to take an elevator to the top floor of that building and just in that section is the clinic. I don't believe it even goes any further in the building than the picture that I will add. Just the top floor of this section. It seemed crazy to me that everything you need for the IVF process is done in this one little office. They do everything here, from office visits, to lab work, to the actual fertilization. Sometimes I am in awe of the way the Germans do things.

Starting Stimulation Meds...

Well, I had my suppression appointment today. The doc called us in to the office and asked me if I had "my woman's day." I asked him WHAT? Barry figured out he was talking about my period. Oh. yeah. okay. So I went in for the u/s. I never seem to learn much from them because the doctor moves the wand one way and then the other way and says, "good." I guess as long as he says that I will be okay, lol. So, we go back into the office and he tells me about my new drug protocol. Add 350IU of Puregon and 1 vial of Menopur to my 1 vial of Decapeptyl. The Puregon is every evening until I go back and get rechecked and the Menopur was every other morning. Then I had some b/w done and we scheduled our next appointments, Monday and Friday next week. Barry was thrilled because he has plans to go golfing next Thursday morning. They told us to call at 4pm and check to make sure nothing had changed.
SO............
I called the clinic at 4pm and they told me that after my b/w, they have decided that I should not take the Menopur at this time. Just the Puregon. They will recheck me on Monday and see how I am progressing. I assume they just don't want to overstimulate me right now, but they don't ever seem to explain much of anything to me. So, until further notice, I will do one vial Decapeptyl in the morning and 350IU Puregon in the evening. That Puregon pen will be heaven after having to mix the others. So, this is what we will do for now and see what they think on Monday.

Doing Shots Alone...

Well, I accomplished my first shot alone today. It was not an easy task. I seemed to have blanked on everything that Barry went over with me the other two days. Really frustrating. I had no problem sucking up the liquid or mixing them together, but I just could not quite get the bubble out without losing some of the liquid. Then I realized that I was trying to get the bubble out of the liquid before mixing. So I mixed them and had to worry about the bubble again. Finally got it right but the shot burned a little more this time. They seem to get worse as I go along. Hmmm...wonder if that is a sign of things to come.
I have three days (counting today) until my suppression appointment. But then we will be hopefully (lol) adding 2 more shots. Should be interesting, to say the least.

One Shot Down....Many To Go

Well, today I administered my first shot of Decapeptyl. I was pretty freaked out all last night leading up to this morning's shot. I did not sleep well leading up to it. We decided to do the shot at the same time we give our dog his medicine. So we got up and started to get this meds together. The mixing was no problem, but when we tried to suck up all the liquid, the needle just did not reach everything. I was so freaked out that I was not getting the right amount of the meds. But Barry talked me down from the ledge, lol. Then when we were trying to make sure the meds were all the way to the end of syringe with no bubbles, I pushed the plunger too far and some of the meds came out into the needle cap. Again, I freaked out that I was not getting the right amount. Then we got to the point where I needed to give myself the shot. I was nervous about doing it but then just went for it. It was nothing. I left the needle in for the 5 seconds after but still had a drop come back out. Oh well, thank goodness I have heard about this happening to other people, that way I did not freak out too much.
So we will do this again tomorrow and the next day and the next day......I am very thankful that Barry was here to help me for the first couple, MAYBE I won't freak out too much when I have to do it on my own.

Day 17 Appointment!!!

Yeah, I never thought this day would ever arrive. We still have not heard anything about whether Barry will have to go away, but we went to the appointment anyway. We sat in the waiting room forever. At first I thought maybe it was because of the fact that the clinic has not received the payment that our insurance sent to them, but we finally got in to see the doctor. He told us we would do ICSI on some of the eggs and regular IVF on some as long as we had plenty to do that with. Then I got "violated" again with the internal ultrasound. Doc said all looked good. We went to another room and our friend the biologist (the only one who speaks decent English) explained the shots to us. The Decapeptyl shots seem pretty easy. They said they will explain the others when we come back again. Oh, I START MY SUPPRESSION MEDS ON SATURDAY!!!!! Then we went over some of the papers that we did not quite understand. We signed everything and then they took some more blood. I have to call in the morning to find out how the levels were. So, it looks like I take my last bcp tomorrow night! They also gave me another script for folic acid, baby aspirin, and a steroid. I need to ask about when to take those when I call tomorrow morning.
But as of now, suppression appointment next Thursday, and ER 5/27, ET 5/29. WE HAVE DATES!!!! WOOOOOHOOOOO!!!!!

What a Difference a Day Makes....

Well, the reason it has taken me so long to update is because we ran into a "not so little snag". One day we get my medicines and am excited, and the next day we find out that Barry might not even be here to do the process. The Air Force wants him to go to school at the beginning of June. That would be really bad for us. Barry put in a letter to try to push off school until later, but we are still waiting to hear back from them. It is making it up the chain apparently, but we still have not heard for sure.
I was devastated when we first heard about this. To wait this long, to take almost all of the bcps, and to get this far, I would have a hard time waiting again. For now, we are going forward until we know otherwise.

Getting the Meds....

Well, this past Monday we went to Luxembourg to pick up my meds. It was not near as overwhelming as I had expected. We had brought our big cooler thinking there was a lot to pick up, but we were surprised when there was not much. And it turned out that they told us only the Puregon needed to be in the fridge. So, we left there with a bag full of meds, syringes, and needles. I took them home and then went and bought a tool box to organize everything.

So, as promised, here are my meds...

So Many Prescriptions...

Well, I just thought I would share my stack of prescriptions with everyone. Never had this many at one time. I have put in the order with the pharmacy in Luxembourg (yes, the country, lol) and we plan to go pick them up on Monday. I will definitely put in a new post after we pick them up so you can all see what I got!

It is Day 10 today and I am feeling much better. The bleeding has seemed to stop (for now), so hopefully it is done. We have our appointment to learn about the shots next Thursday. We have to pay up front for the ICSI that day as well.

Oh, speaking of money, we went and got our loan on Monday so that we can pay for all of this. We were happy that at least that went off without a hitch.

I do just want to say that a friend had a great ET the other day. Please keep her in your prayers.

I will post once we get the meds, until then....

Update....I just found out today when going over my paperwork that there are more meds that I will need to be taking as well as the prescriptions above. I need Folic Acid, Baby Aspirin, and Dexamethason (a steroid, which seemed strange to me). I am going to email the clinic and then ask again on Thursday when we go to our appointment.